Sunday, August 25, 2013

Just Say Yes

Life becomes much less stressful and our relationships have less conflict when I allow myself to say "Yes" more often to the children.

Yes, you can wear whatever you want to the mall.

Yes, your hair can look however you feel most comfortable.
Yes, I will wait and watch you climb a wall on our way inside.
Yes, you can choose a red bow tie even though the rest of us are wearing yellow for our family portraits.
Yes, you can change your mind and choose a purple neck tie at the next store we visit.
Yes, we can stop for snacks.
Yes, we can search the Lego website at the Lego store, even though you could do that at home just as easily.
Yes, we can stop to watch people ice skating.
Yes, you can climb the wall again on our way out.
Yes, you can ride in the cart at the grocery store with the car in the front, even though I think you're probably getting too big for it.
Yes, I will be patient while you walk alongside me instead of being carried.
Yes, I will patiently wait for you to finish your game before using the computer myself.
Yes, you can sit outside and watch the neighbor kid mow the lawn, even though I think it's too hot to be outside.
Yes, you can finish typing this post for me.

It isn't always easy, but I have to ask myself- Is it a matter of health or safety? Am I considering the wants and needs of the boys as equal to my own? Is this encouraging them to be responsible for themselves? Are they disrespecting anyone else or their property? Once I answer these questions for myself, the answer I should give in response to the boys' requests becomes much clearer.
 

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